Blogging, Depression

Take Two.

 

 

I don’t know why I have found this so hard to do for such a while. I absolutely love/d writing for my blog and yet I was suddenly overcome with an anxiety behind it. Like no one was truly interested in what I had to say. Which I know is silly because so many of you viewed my posts. It was like I suddenly felt there was no purpose to it all.

 

At First I assumed it was writers block. I worried my posts just seemed like I was not enjoying parenthood (which could not be further from the truth). I had seen so many comments in the media about how others don’t enjoy reading about the barrage of mothers who have a humorous view to parenting. That they thought it was disgusting to allow you child to eat the bag of wotsits they found down the side of their car seat (In my defense I never actually ‘let’ her, I simply turned round and saw her eating them with no idea as to where they had come from!?)

 

I think I was reading too deeply into status’s on facebook where people I was once close to wrote things such as ‘ I wish these mothers would stop complaining about their kids like they are a burden’. While this was never directly tagged as being towards me I think my anxiety played a big part in my mind going 2 + 2 = 5. I’m not proud of how my mind assumed it was about me but I think I was just in a rather down period and silly assumptions jump from my mind all the time … (Like when Manthing wanted to stay up and finish watching his film and I assumed it meant something else, deeper down, and I escalated the whole situation from nothing).

 

It’s taken me a few weeks to realise that this blog was actually assisting my anxiety. There’s not many who think of me as down and reclusive, as I can be very good at putting on an act. Some people see it as just those who keep themselves locked up in doors, but that is far from the truth! So I am going to give this go. Bare with me if I stumble!

 

 

Until next time …

 

 

Sarah xx

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12 thoughts on “Take Two.”

  1. I say if others can’t find the humor in the difficulties of parenting, that’s on them! My kids are the joys of my life but they absolutely drive me insane at some point every single day. They ARE my burden. They are my burden for creating more joy in this life for myself and for everyone who knows them and I will gladly carry them. And joke about how heavy they are 😂 keep writing momma! For every one person out there who doesn’t want to hear it, there are probably two more who NEED to hear it to feel normal and keep going!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I think we all struggle to wonder if you are relevant from time to time. I’m glad you came back to it. You’ll be really happy that you did when you look back over the years. I started a blog in 2006 that was private and just for my family afar. It was a lovely hobby and a sort of living breathing family journal. With the advent of Facebook, and wondering if anyone cared, I stopped blogging all together. I just recently started a blog now that my kids are all grown – it’s a passion project that is very fulfilling for me – I wish I never would have stopped. But, can’t change it now. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Be encouraged! Like that of the “prayer warrior”, the lifestyle and process of a full-time writer includes many hours of getting inside ones own head and heart (introspection); and the fullness of who we are does embrace “the good, the bad, and the “I really don’t want to go through this again!” Continue to write with the understanding—the respect you show yourself can become the healing, helping part for others. Thanks for responding to my blog, THE WHOLE ARMOR OF GOD.

    Liked by 1 person

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